For the heart I once had

"It comes and goes" by Christian Schloe

Heaven today is but a way
To a place I once called home.
Heart of a child, one final sigh
As another love goes cold.

Once my heart beats to the rhythm of the falling snow
blackened below.
The river now flows - a stream on molten virgin snow.

[Chorus:]
For the heart I'll never have,
For the child forever gone
The music flows because it longs
For the heart I once had.

Living today without a way
To understand the weight of the world.
Faded and torn, old and forlorn
My weak and hoping heart.

For the child, for the night
For the heart I once had
I believe and foresee
Everything I could ever be.

[Chorus]

Time will not heal a dead boy's scars,
Time will kill.

[Chorus]

"Nightfall" by Christian Schloe

You oughta know

"Garden of melancholia" by Christian Schloe

I want you to know, that I'm happy for you
I wish nothing but the best for you both
An older version of me
Is she perverted like me
Would she go down on you in a theatre
Does she speak eloquently
And would she have your baby
I'm sure she'd make a really excellent mother

'cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able
To make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, till you died
But you're still alive

And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

You seem very well, things look peaceful
I'm not quite as well, I thought you should know
Did you forget about me Mr. Duplicity
I hate to bug you in the middle of dinner
It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced
Are you thinking of me when you fuck her?

'cause the love that you gave that we made wasn't able
To make it enough for you to be open wide, no
And every time you speak her name
Does she know how you told me you'd hold me
Until you died, til you died
But you're still alive

And I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

'cause the joke that you laid on the bed that was me
And I'm not gonna fade
As soon as you close your eyes and you know it
And every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back
I hope you feel it...well can you feel it

Well, I'm here to remind you
Of the mess you left when you went away
It's not fair to deny me
Of the cross I bear that you gave to me
You, you, you oughta know

"Set your heart free" by Christian Schloe

They see me beautiful

"You see me differently 

than I've ever seen myself

[...]

But you say I don't know 

what I'm talking about this time

that I keep myself from flying"

"Semblanza de Nerea: Una mujer fuerte. Creativa e inteligente. Tenaz. Una amiga para toda la vida. Si hay una mujer que respeto, ésa eres tú. Qué chido conocer a alguien tan fuerte como tú."

Karolus me dijo "Ésa es la mirada, la pasión que siempre he visto en ti y al fin la capté"

"Inside I'm dying, 

I hide from the light

But you see me beautiful

I roar like a lion

An unlovable sight

But you see me beautiful"

"¡En verdad que admiro todo lo que haces! Estudias, trabajas y trabajas y trabajas, tienes tiempo para nosotros y lo más importante, haces un excelente papel como mamá... ¡¡¡y papá!!! No por nada G es así. Sin duda tu mejor trabajo es ése, ser mamá de un niño tan increíble."

"Amas lo que haces y eso se desborda, nunca he conocido a alguien tan apasionada como tú"

"Mujer de sueños, de fantasías, de realidades, de perfección para la persona que tenga a bien realizar el hermoso oficio de amarte"

Yo soy Nerea. Soy esa Nerea que todos ven. Es hora de que yo la vea.

Estúpida nostalgia

Estoy triste, muy, muy triste. Y terriblemente enojada. Ayer acabó el festejo de G y lo único que yo quería era llorar como si no hubiera mañana. Y me causó una rabia tremenda porque no hay motivos para estar triste. Pero me enoja este vaivén estúpido y absurdo. Romper, romper con todo. Quizá Crash y MiniBuda tienen razón y hay que quemar la caja, a ver si un incendio me ayudo al fin. Hay que creer...

Estrellas viajeras

"Papilla estelar" Remedios Varo

Así, como estrella viajera, pasó
Voló por encima llenando la vida de dudas y promesas,
de revaloraciones del presente y contemplaciones del futuro
Y entonces ¡puf!
Desapareció

Lejos, tan lejos.
Dejando una estela de luz
Disfrazada de duda.
Así, como una estrella viajera, se fue.

Iba preparando el terreno para todo lo demás.
Yo no lo supe ver en su momento.
Mucho menos lo supe valorar.
¡Qué lejos, tan lejos, se fue!
Pequeña estrella viajera.

El arte de perder

"The day you left was my beginning"

Y justo en el momento en que te perdí, me encontré...

One Art

Elizabeth Bishop, 1911 - 1979

The art of losing isn’t hard to master;
so many things seem filled with the intent
to be lost that their loss is no disaster.

Lose something every day. Accept the fluster
of lost door keys, the hour badly spent.
The art of losing isn’t hard to master.